Chapter II – The Plan

For a week Jim continued to stay at the house but I had no illusions that I would come home one day and he would be gone. On the ninth day I got a call while at work. He wanted to sit down that evening and discuss future plans for both of us. Translation, he was going to tell me his plans.
For a week, once the word got out in the office, I had listened to the advice of some of my friends and associates. Two of my best friends were divorced, Joy’s sister Jan and Ann who worked across the street at our warehouse where she was the administrative assistant to the supervisor. And there was Linda who was also recently divorced. All agreed that my first course of action should be to close out our joint checking account. Since I had direct deposit for my pay check each week, keeping it open would mean that either of us would have unlimited access to any amount in it and they felt that Jim would take advantage of the situation. While I disagreed something in the back of my mind urged me to take their advice. After all, a week ago I hadn’t conceived of my spouse wanting to quit our marriage. Anything was possible now. Fortunately I had a separate checking account that I had opened several months before just for convenience, plus a savings account just in my name. It was easy just to have the company move my direct deposit to my single accounts and for good measure I designated 75% to the checking and 25% to the savings. I had a feeling I was going to need it.
Wanting to keep the evening civil I fixed a light dinner of pasta and salad. Can’t argue over a pleasant meal or at least that’s the way I saw it. First on the agenda, he wanted keep the dogs. Duke and the Duchess were our other children. We had gotten them from a breeder in Ohio, first Duke then Duchess three years later. They had been 8 weeks old when they had come to us. They were not for breeding though they were both pure bred of champion stock. They were our companions and I loved them both. The idea of giving them up was disheartening but separating them would be even worse. I never doubted that Jim loved them as much as I did and would take exceptional care of them. Being high maintenance canines, they needed a lot of exercising and a lot of energy. He made a valid point that in my present state I could not walk or play with them. For now he would leave them with me, but when the time came and he had settled in his own place he was going to take them with him.
Having brought up the subject of getting his own place he told me he was moving out that night and staying with a friend from work for the time being. But he would come in the mornings and evenings to take the dogs for their run. Again he mentioned that “I could have the house and most of its contents.” At this I snickered. I told him that until the day came that he signed it over to me he was still going to have to be responsible for at least half the mortgage. By the look on his face and his reaction I knew I had struck a cord. I got the distinct impression he hadn’t considered that I would catch on to his ‘plan’.
The house was in both our names, but besides a mortgage, it had a lean on it in connection to his bankruptcy. There was no way he could turn the title over to me until he had paid off his creditors and dissolved the bankruptcy. Recovering his composure, he said that he would pay the mortgage for the next three months as the bankruptcy would be paid off by that time. This was news to me. I thought he had two more years left on it. Where had he gotten the money to jump ahead like that? We’ll come back to that later.
Last on his list was the resolution about the pensions. Here it comes! Jim would not make any claim to my pension. How magnanimous of him! Though I had a 401K at work which to date had approximately $8000.00 in it, I also had a very small pension with the hospital where I use to work. I was receiving a monthly check for $70.00 from it as the hospital had closed and the money had been put in a protective government account. Not earning any interest, I had started an ING account and had it directly deposited each month. If you don’t see it, you don’t spend it! As for the 401K, I would have had twice the amount invested had I not had to withdraw a portion of it to help us get out a near financial disaster some years before. We were broke, the mortgage was behind and the debts had piled high. Jim had said we would lose the house if I didn’t take the money out and I felt cornered, so stupidly I had agreed. He reasoned that his pension would provide for us both when the time came.
Now for the flip side! He wanted me to agree that I would not go after his pension. Whoa, hold up! This was not happening. Why would he think that I would agree to such a ridiculous idea? He said that one day he might want to remarry. “Well”, I said, “let her get her own pension!” We were married 33 years, I had priority and I had earned the privilege. This may sound crude but no way was I giving up on what I felt was rightfully my claim. Dinner was over. Things were about to get ugly.
Jim was generally not a violent person, at least not physically. But he did have a hidden, devilish side to him. He could be vengeful. As a former Criminal Investigator for the IRS (yes, that most hollowed and terrifying branch of our government), he knew how to work the system. Looking into his eyes now I could see the wheels turning.
“I will fight you in court on this and you’ll end up embarrassing yourself and the children.” he threatened.
Now I saw it. Whenever he felt his back was to the wall, Jim always resorted to threats. He was a good chess player but had a lousy poker face and couldn’t bluff for nothing. In that instant I thought of Joy and what she would have said in this situation.
Joy had taught me a lot through the years we worked together and now it was about to pay off. Jokingly she had called me many a time a ‘wimp’ because I never could say no to the sales people whenever they would come to me with their last minute projects and problems, nor to my kids when they wanted something like borrowing the car, babysitting or money, nor to Jim when he wanted to buy something new though I worried about all the spending. nor when he would ask me catch a ride with a friend home because he wanted the car to go play golf with his buddies.
I thought of all that in that moment as I prepared my retort to his threat. With eyes wide open and an expression of total sincerity and defiance, I stared at him from the other end of the table and said…”Bite Me!” THANK YOU JOY!